Years ago, a friend in Alcoholics Anonymous (A.A.) shared the Twelve Steps with me and recommended I go to Al‑Anon. He recognized how ill I was and understood why. I knew only that I lived in anger and despair. I didn’t know I was desperately ill.

Upon reading the Twelve Steps, I was instantly stunned, as they expressed a way of life so different from the way I’d lived up to that point at age 46. At that time, I feared for my life, but I believed if I could learn to live in accordance with these Steps, my life would be saved. I did not realize then that alcoholism was even present in my life. I later learned I had been surrounded by it from birth. 

What people said in meetings was foreign to me at first, but after a while I began to relate. In time, it became evident to me that I’d adopted many character defects as my way of dealing with life. Most, if not all, of these defects resulted in anger, which had then grown into rage. I persisted in attending my meetings even though self-knowledge came slowly and often painfully.

In time, my crippling thinking was replaced by what I call Al‑Anon thinking. I was on the long road to serenity, though I didn’t know it in the beginning. My blind, dumb persistence eventually led me to serenity, although it took quite a few years. It has been well worth the time and the work in Al‑Anon. 

By Bruce S., Minnesota

The Forum, March 2024

 

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